Coming Clean


I’ve been putting this off, but I can’t do so forever.  It’s time to talk.  No advice, no musings…just me and whoever’s reading this.

Let me introduce myself.  Hi.  I’m Henry.

I’m sure you’ve got a few questions, and I can guess at them some.  First question you probably have: Who are you, and why are you posting on this blog?

Well, there’s a pretty simple answer to that.  It’s my blog.

And now that raises another question: Why are you spitting on the memory of this dead guy by rewriting his blog?

I’m not.  See, that was me, too.  Henry’s my name.  Not my handle.  Not my persona.  Not my mask.  If you look for it, you can see that I’m the same guy, down to the quirks no one notices.  My manually naming untitled posts “Untitled” because leaving the title space blank annoys me.  The extra space I put between the title and the body text, just because I think the spacing looks better.  If you look for it, you’ll see that I’m telling the truth.  Either that, or I’m just an obsessive fan, and—let’s be honest here—no one would obsess over me.

There are questions I’m sure you have that I won’t answer yet.  Things I’m not ready to say.  How am I talking to you?  Wasn’t I supposed to be dead?  What’s going on?  Where am I?  When am I?  I think I can answer these.  I’m not sure, though, and even if I was, I wouldn’t be ready to.  See, this is…an unusual situation, and one that’s a bit hard to explain.

Some of you might still be in the dark.  Well, there was this blog.  A blog called Now I Shall Know You Again.  If you haven’t read it, you should, since it’ll help you understand this better.  But if you don’t have the time, let me provide a very quick summary: a young man trying to provide advice to keep other people alive ends up dealing with a split persona and turns to despair when a particularly close friend of his gets involved and ultimately killed—a death he feels responsible for.

Don’t see where I’m going?  Well, let me explain.  If I had to choose my favorite game, it’d probably be The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask.  It’s such an interesting concept, and it can really only be told through a video game.  Our protagonist, Link, finds himself thrust into a strange, new world called Termina, completely unprepared, and finds that he has to stop the moon from crashing into the land and destroying it entirely.  On top of that, the moon’s descent will be complete in only three days.  Fortunately, Link is able to recover the Ocarina of Time, a flute-like instrument that allows him to turn back time and restart those three days—but every time he does, all he’s done in Termina is undone.

Majora’s Mask runs on what’s called a Groundhog Day Loop.  It’s named for the Bill Murray movie, Groundhog Day, where he relives the titular day over and over, until he’s finally able to do things right.  He can’t die, he can’t change anything but himself, and by the end of the movie, he’s been around long enough to master certain skills (like playing the piano) and memorize the events of the day.  Of course, in Groundhog Day, all you see is glimpses.  In Majora’s Mask, you’re actually able to spend three days following someone around.  You can see what they do, where they go, what their schedules are like.  You live those three days over and over until you’re able to beat the game, slowly gathering the equipment to do so.

Why am I going into this?  Because Majora’s Mask was all about the sidequests, and the sidequests were all about helping people.  One thing I loved doing was making sure I did all the sidequests on the last day before beating the final boss, even if I had gotten the reward for the sidequest already, just so I could say that, this time, it was permanent.  This time, the changes wouldn’t be undone by resetting time.  In the game, you had the feeling you could make a difference.  You wanted to help these people with everything from saving a marriage to saving a farm to saving the mayor from an unpleasant argument.

Well, I want to help people.  And I fucked it up.  And then, I was given my own Groundhog Day.  My own Song of Time.  And this time, I was going to make the most of it.  Get my thoughts together.  Get Hyde under control so I could be more reliable.  Drive people further away in case I wasn’t.

But most importantly, I was going to save Girl this time.  No, not Girl.  It’s kind of rude to call her that.  Erin.  I was going to make sure Erin got out of this okay.

Well…it isn’t working.  She knows.  She knows about him.  The Slender Man.  Even though I thought I did things right, she still knows about him and still asked me about him.  She’s already started writing in a notebook like she had before.  I almost think it might be worse this time.  And I don’t know if I can save her.

I’m scared guys.  I’ll flat-out admit it.  I am fucking scared.  I think I did this wrong.  I don’t know if I’ll have to do it again.  I don’t know if I can handle it another time.  All the people I knew back then?  The few people I could almost consider friends, or at least acquaintances?  Slice, Andrew, Ava, Aimee, Ali…even Frap?  They’re all gone.  Dead.  All the people I know now?  They’re all dying, too.  Zeke and M are the only constants.  I can’t stand meeting new people again.  I can’t seeing new faces and getting invested in them and then watching them die.  It doesn’t matter if they take my advice or not.  If they don’t and they die, I couldn’t help them.  If they do and they die, that’s almost worse, because I tried to help them, but I failed.

I can’t go through that again, guys.  I can’t be some constant, watching new faces come and go just as quickly, powerless to do anything.  And above all, I can’t let Erin die again.  I can’t stand to watch her die over and over.  I don’t even have that stupid crush on her anymore holding me back.  I hope that she and her boyfriend are happy.  I just want to to be her friend, and I just want to be able to help her.

But I don’t know if I can.

I’m open to advice, but I can’t accept help.  Where I am, you can’t go.  I have to do this on my own.  But please, I know…I know that there’s almost no one out there, but that doesn’t mean that I want to do it alone.



Hyde’s Musings #2: Multiverses


Hello again, friends.  Hyde has returned to ponder some of the greater mysteries surrounding Our Mutual Friend.  Today, the topic I’ll be covering is that of multiverses.  What does this have to do with the Slender Man, you may be asking?


A recurring term I’ve been hearing lately is “Dimensional Bleeding.”  Our friends at Observe and Terminate first noticed it when PTC member B2 began showing up in multiple places at the same time.  It’s a fairly self-explanatory theory: alternate dimensions are bleeding into each other.

So what does this mean for us?  What purpose does this wonderful thing called Dimensional Bleeding serve?  Simply put, it explains everything.  All the small inconsistencies running through the blogs that cannot simply explained by unreliable narration.  When one deals with a subtle Slender Man and another deals with one that is highly aggressive, how can we then explain this?  Why is it why some of us fight armies of “proxies” and others find the concept so ridiculous that we put the term in quotes.

Simply put, so very many things can be explained by the fact that we all inhabit different dimensions or realities, which all bleed into each other.  Perhaps the internet serves as a sort of hub where messages from all these dimensions converge.

What this means, naturally, is that every last word is true.  And every last word is real.  And at the same time, they’re all completely false.  Perhaps in one reality, Marble Hornets is a web series created by film students Troy Wagner and Joseph DeLage.  But perhaps, in another reality, it is a series of videos chronicling the very real journey into hell of Alex Kralie and Jay [Undisclosed] (while the [Of No Consequence] and [Undisclosed] families are often cited as sharing many common ancestors, I regret that Jay and I share no relation).

What exactly causes this Dimensional Bleeding?  Well, there is a good chance that it involves one or more of three things: the Bleeding Tree, the Slender Man, and the Path of Black Leaves.  While it is nothing more than a theory, I would speculate that the Path of Black Leaves is the “What,” the Bleeding Tree is the “How,” and the Slender Man is the “Why.”  What do I mean by this?  Allow me to explain.

The Path of Black Leaves is what is causing the Dimensional Bleeding in the first place.  Consciously or subconsciously, both sides are traveling through it.  Sometimes the Path warps space and time, creating a sort of wormhole from one location in space to another.  This much has been all but confirm, and likely explains any sort of teleportation used by our tall friend.  But it is quite possible that the Path can create what is less of a wormhole and more of a portal.  A portal to another dimension.  We pass through these portals almost unconsciously, jumping around from one world to another and unintentionally wreaking general havoc on the universe.

Good job, Hyde.  Now you’re thinking with portals.  You must be the pride of [Subject Hometown Here].  Also, I think that that last statement requires an obligatory “Nice job breaking it, hero.”

Sorry, sorry.  I’m done here.

The Bleeding Tree could quite possibly explain how the Path of Black Leaves works.  After all, what sort of leaves would you expect to fall from a tree that bleeds?  A tree that is incredibly hard to find.  A tree that may even be mobile.  Perhaps the adjective refers to more than actual blood.  Perhaps it is what causes the dimensions to bleed in the first place.

But why would any of this be happening, especially when it wasn’t happening before?  The “why” is explainable when you bring the Slender Man into the picture.  He utilizes the path, ripping holes in the fabric of reality.  Perhaps proxies are able to utilize the path because he allows them to.  Perhaps other times whatever wormholes or portals he creates when he shifts between dimensions merely get left over.  Perhaps he even pulls us between dimensions.  Who can say for sure?

These, naturally, are all just theories.  Musings.  Far be it from me to claim to be right.

Good Luck and Godspeed,


Hyde’s Musings #1: Lost Time


Hello again, friends.  The Pretentious Punster has returned!  You are all well, I trust?

How I wish that rhetorical question could be answered with an honest “yes,” for I know that none of us are well, or can ever be truly well again.  But I’m rambling, aren’t I?  I’m here for a purpose, so why beat around the metaphorical bush?

You see, I have quite a curious little mind (thanks to Jekyll’s overthinking), and I often ponder the greater mysteries that Jekyll quite frankly doesn’t care about.  Allow me, for a moment, to talk a bit about Lost Time.

Do you all remember the inability to remember?  I trust that you recall the mistrust of self that comes with a lack of recollection.  Perhaps you have never experienced it yourself, and remember it solely from the tales of old, in which hours, days, weeks, or even months would disappear from one’s head.  But that is specifically what makes me curious: no one ever seems to find the time to lose it anymore.  No recent revelations of missing hours spring to mind.

Why should this be?  Why are we so immune to his effects?  I have no answers, but I have my theories.

Theory #1: We have simply become prepared enough to prevent it.  Knowledge is our metaphorical pen to combat his sword.  If we are prepared for lost time, we can recognize when it happens and prevent it from happening in the first place.  It is natural selection at its finest: we have simply developed our “sixth sense” to the point that we have erected mental barriers as a defense to prevent it.

Theory #2: This theory relies on the theory that lost time is due to the Breaking process.  When one is under the Dapper Businessman’s control, they are simply unaware of anything and consequently lose time.  Why does this mean that lost time has been lost?  Well, it means that he simply has enough willing volunteers that he does not need as much extra assistance.  As a tie-in to Theory #1, only the mentally weak or those willing enough to join him in the first place are in his employ, and they are losing either no time at all, or have no time at all of their own to lose.

Both of these theories assume that the Dapper Businessman works both subtly and directly.  While stalking relies on his target noticing him, and evisceration or disembowelment are perhaps the most direct path he can take, some processes rely on his target’s complete obliviousness.  Lost time is part of this, and is likely related to the Breaking process.  While I do not believe that “hallowing” is an appropriate term, it is this process that I am referring to.  Once he has Broken a target, they become a mere puppet whose strings he can yank; a toy that is barely a step above an inanimate object.  However, even if this theory is true, there are, of course, exceptions.  Some targets he has Broken resist it, and are in a constant state of semi-consciousness, aware enough to know that they’re under his control, but unaware enough to have any control of their own.

Theory #3: He simply does not do so anymore, due to his constantly changing nature (which I plan on elaborating on in a future post).

Those are my theories.  Any others are greatly appreciated.  Discuss, please, for I’m sure everyone else is as eager to pick your brain as I am.

Good Luck and Godspeed,


Now You Shall Know Me Again

I suppose that, since Jekyll has introduced himself inadequately, it is up to Yours Truly to, in addition to myself, acquaint you with him properly.

Good day.  My name is Of No Consequence, though my pseudonym is Hyde.  Jekyll’s name, incidentally, is also Of No Consequence, a fact attributable to the fact that we are, in fact, the same person.  Jekyll wishes to elaborate in a later post, so I shall leave the explanations of why this simultaneous duality and singularity exists within us to him.

So who is Jekyll?  And who is Hyde?  I, my friends, am Hyde: the amiable, polite, and (dare I be so conceited to say it?) clever half.  Jekyll, on the other hand…well, perhaps it would make more sense coming from him.

Jekyll here.  Just clarifying quickly that Hyde’s also the stupid one.  Or maybe just the one who doesn’t overthink things, which in my opinion makes him the stupid one.  I’ll analyze every angle, brainstorm every theory, and do everything that I can to keep myself (and through my advice, all of you) alive as long as possible.  Admittedly, I’m also a cocky, almost downright unlikable prick.  An “arrogant bastard of a nerd,” if you will.

And now, since I’m sure you’re obviously seeking Hyde at this point, I make my triumphant return.  I exist largely because, at times, Jekyll needs to relieve the stress of being who he is.  An deterrent to the constant pressure.  My approach is different than his.  You’ll see both approaches in time.

Now, not only is our name Of No Consequence.  We reside in the rural town of Of No Consequence, Trivial in continental America, though we are currently attending college in the more urban Undisclosed, Trivial.  We are approximately 20 years old, though a specific number shall be withheld.  Frustratingly vague, I’m sure, but I’m afraid that we cannot elaborate due to Jekyll’s rampant paranoia.

But please, don’t be a stranger because of that.  Jekyll may not trust people, but I assure you that I do.  Comment, and let us become more acquainted.  After all, despite my name, I carry no cane, and if I did, I would certainly not savagely beat you with it.